Three samples on this page — an article about the Hardrock 100 mile endurance run that appeared in the Summer 2012 issue of Destination Silverton, an article on health care reform that was carried in the Silverton Standard newspaper of January, 2009, and scroll down for a vitamin promotion copywriting exercise I wrote for my American Writers and Artists Inc. course.
GOING THE DISTANCE IN THE HARDROCK HUNDRED
By Bob Boeder
During the late 19th century, hardy prospectors ventured into the San Juan Mountains seeking their fortunes mining gold and silver hidden among the lofty crags and valleys of southwest Colorado. The miners constructed foot trails, burro trails, wagon roads and railroads to transport working materials to the mines and haul ore to markets. Founded in 1992, the Hardrock 100 Mile Endurance Run follows those routes and celebrates the region’s mining heritage over a grueling 100-mile course.
The run starts and ends in Silverton, passes through Ouray and Telluride, and traverses some of the most beautiful and rugged mountains in the world. Entrants cross thirteen passes above 12,000 feet, reach a high point of 14,048 feet on Handies Peak, and endure 33,992 feet of climb and an equal descent for a total elevation change of 67,984 feet.
The Hardrock Hundred is held the second weekend in July. Each year the race is run in the opposite direction of the previous years’s event. Runners start at 6 o’clock in the morning on Friday in front of the Silverton School and are given 48 hours to complete the course. As of 2011 the best performance by a male is Kyle Skagg’s time of 23:23 set in 2008. The women’s course record was set by Diana Finkel of South Fork, Colorado. She finished in 27:18 in 2009. Finkle is the only four-time female winner of the race. The average finishing time is 41:10. Before their time is recorded runners are required to “kiss the Hardrock,” a ram’s head painted on a large block of stone.
The Hardrock course is designed to provide extreme challenges in altitude, steepness, and remoteness. Runners crawl on their hands and knees up mountainsides and slide downhill on their backsides over snowpack. They run and hike in blistering sunlight and in the cold, black dead of night guided by flashlight beams. They hide from lightning in the high country and push on through monsoon rainstorms while wading a dozen frigid mountain streams.
So far no one has died during the race, but the Hardrock runner’s manual states, “It is our general opinion that the first fatality we may have will be either from hypothermia or lightning.” It could as easily be from a long fall or altitude-induced pulmonary edema.
Even the best conditioned athletes run only 60% of the course. Most of the uphill sections are walked. Many suffer from vomiting, diarrhea, dehydration, pulmonary distress, shredded feet, knee and hip discomfort. Kirk Apt, who has completed sixteen Hardrock 100s, more than any other runner, says, “When it gets really bad, it’s like a case of the flu that’s so rough, even your brain hurts.”
For all of the race’s perils, however, the majority of the 140 starters each year have previously entered or finished the race. Something about this wildest and toughest of all the 100 mile trail races, some necessity in their hearts, keeps bringing them back. Like the hardrock miners 120 years ago possessed by gold fever, today’s Hardrock 100 Mile trail runners are consumed by the raw power of the San Juans.
Bob Boeder lives in Silverton. He started the Hardrock 100 five times, finished once and has written a book about the race called Hardrock Fever. Running 100 Miles in Colorado’s San Juan Mountains.
Article published in the Silverton Standard newspaper, January, 2009.
HEALTH CARE NEEDS REFORM
Robert Boeder
Last Tuesday evening fourteen people gathered at the parsonage of the First
Congregational Church to share their thoughts about what is wrong with the current
health care system and suggest ways to fix it. One of 4,200 such events held around
the country from December 15 to 31, the meeting was organized by Bob
Boeder, Western Slope field representative for the Colorado Council of Churches'
Colorado Voices for Coverage program. "Consumers are fed up with the current
system," Boeder said. "We are part of a grass-roots experiment in policy-making
to provide recommendations on improving health care to Tom Daschle, President-elect
Obama's incoming Secretary of Health and Human Services."
Of the 28 industrialized democracies, the United States is the only one that does not
provide universal health coverage for its citizens. Forty-five million Americans including
800,000 Coloradans have no health insurance. Large medical bills forcing people into
bankruptcy and foreclosure have been one of the main contributors to our current
financial crisis. Thirty cents out of every health care dollar goes to administrative costs,
taking money away from providing care.
"The main problem is the insurance companies," said Hiroki Ide, a specialist in
oriental medicine. "They put profits ahead of providing coverage for everyone by
raising premiums and co-pays for older people and by excluding people with
pre-existing conditions." "The drug companies are also to blame, "Cynthia Chertos,
pastor of First Congregational Church, chimed in. "My medication is so expensive
my insurance company will only pay for a small part of what I need. Why can't I
purchase quality medications at an affordable price?"
Access to health care is a problem for residents of San Juan County. Newcomers
Jann Hebert and James Manning complained they are having trouble finding a
family practice physician who will take on new patients. According to county health
nurse, Loretta St. George, our county has the most acute shortage of health care
professionals in the entire state. "What we need the most," she said, "is continuity of
care with a permanent provider."
Attendees at the meeting talked about other ways to fix the problem. Bob Boeder noted
that the majority of those attending a similar discussion in Durango advocated a single
payer system where providers are paid from a fund administered by the government.
Sheriff Sue Kurtz said she found that idea interesting, but she wanted more information.
President-elect Obama's health care plan calls for a national health information
technology system that will save billions by computerizing all health care records.
He plans to expand Medicaid and the State Child Health Insurance Program (SCHIP)
and he wants to offer access to the Federal Employees Health Benefits Program
(FEHBP) to the general public.
Dr. Bob Brokering pointed out that even if everyone is covered by health insurance,
remote small towns like Silverton are lacking the equipment and laboratories needed to
provide advanced health care to people. One answer might be the creation of a
federally financed community health center serving San Juan and Ouray counties.
One suggestion everyone agreed on was that people have to do a better job of
managing their own health. School superintendant, Kim White, said that anti-smoking
campaigns have been a big success at the school with 9 out of 10 students pledging
not to smoke. White recommended the creation of wellness centers in all schools
starting with pre-school to educate parents and children about the need for exercise,
proper nutrition and good health habits.
Following the meeting Boeder e-mailed the attendees' comments to the Obama
transition team. Anyone can make a suggestion on improving health care in this country
by going online to change.gov. The Obama-Biden transition team especially encourages
people to submit stories of failures of the current health care system and bad expriences
they have had with drug and insurance companies.
What follows is a copywriting exercise I wrote for the American Writers and Artists Inc. course.
COVER LETTER:
April 24, 2012.
Dear Client,
Attached is your completed vitamin promotion as a 12 page file in Microsoft Word format.
The package includes the following:
- Envelope teaser copy.
- Ten page sales letter, order device and premium summary.
- One page lift note.
- One buckslip.
I have taken the liberty of coining the name MAX-LIFE for your vitamin product. Thanks for giving me the opportunity to build your sales promotion. I look forward to your timely feedback which will enable me to make corrections before your deadline.
Sincerely, Robert Boeder
ENVELOPE TEASER:
DON’T TAKE RISKS WITH YOUR HEALTH!
ARM YOURSELF WITH THIS SUPERFOOD!
SALES LETTER:
POWERFUL SUPERFOOD!
FORMULATED FOR MALE NEEDS!
THIRTY-ONE VITAMINS AND MINERALS!
THREE AMINO ACID COMPLEXES!
ELEVEN TONIC WHOLE HERB EXTRACTS
AND MORE!
Are you Health Conscious? In Command at Home and at Work? On Top of Your Game? Want to Stay There? Here’s How to LIVE HEALTHY!
Hello. Let me introduce myself. My name is Dr. Martin Smith. I’m director of the Martin Smith Clinic and Health Awareness Center. Are you the kind of guy who believes good health is the basis of a good life? If you are, I’m going to show you how to gain control of your health and your vitality, how to be more active and how to improve your sex life.
When I was growing up in the U.K. my Dad was my hero. He was a healthy robust man who lived an active life, just like you. When I was in my teens something happened to Dad. He lost his vitality. He became listless, sluggish, apathetic. It was like he gave up on life. It hurt me to watch Dad’s mental and physical decline. I’m writing this letter because I don’t want that to happen to you. I don’t want you to end up like my Dad, a worn out shell of his former self.
As I watched Dad fading away my goal in life became finding out what caused him to lose it and discovering a way to bring him back. I worked hard at school and earned an undergraduate degree at Oxford University, one of the best in the world. Then I came to the U.S. and obtained my medical degree from Johns Hopkins University, one of the top medical schools in the world. After graduating I stayed at Johns Hopkins and studied the decline in health typical of family men with demanding jobs – men like Dad and yourself −when they reach middle age. These were men headed for the top of their professions who, at some point, lost their drive to succeed. They ran out of energy not only on the job, but for the family and leisure time activities they used to enjoy.
I grew up in a small town outside of Louisville, Kentucky, and it was a great life. Played outside all summer long in bare feet and the winters were just cold enough to be interesting. Now I live in Detroit and you know how those Michigan winters are! Every other week there’s a snowstorm. I started getting lots of colds and flu-like symptoms. Not anymore. I’ve been taking your formula for 2 months now and have not experienced even the slightest sniffle.
Jack Crombly, Detroit, MI
DIET IS THE PROBLEM.
After studying this problem for a number of years what I found surprised me and it will shock you too. Every doctor worth his salt will tell you that no smoking, drinking alcohol in moderation, daily exercise and a diet rich in fruits and vegetables are the keys to good health, but I found that the typical Western diet was not providing the necessary nutrients to support a healthy lifestyle. Without the energy that nutrients were supposed to provide, men were too tired to exercise. It was a vicious circle of inadequate nutrition leading to loss of energy resulting in poor job performance and low quality of life.
When I brought my findings about the lack of nutritional value in Western diets to my colleagues at Johns Hopkins they didn’t believe me. My ideas were rejected. I was labeled the Brit who didn’t like hot dogs and hamburgers. Imagine that!
It turned out that the vitamin content of our food is constantly changing. Growing conditions are almost never perfect – both light and heat can affect nutrient levels and leave our food depleted by the time it gets to us. Food that we think may be fresh and full of nutrients can be practically devoid of nutritional value. We cannot know how long or under what conditions the grower stored out food before it was sent to market. I found that between farm and supper table the vitamin content of our food was slowly disappearing.
On my next sabbatical I traveled to China to a small town called Linhai south of Shanghai that is renowned for the vitality of its male population. Men in Linhai are famous for taking second wives and fathering children into their 70’s. A Linhai man holds the Chinese 80 year old age-group record for the marathon. Linhai is also a center of ancient healing knowledge. I was privileged to sit at the feet of men who shared their age-old secrets with me. I found out where the men of Linhai got their strength and stamina and I’m going to share that secret with you, but before I do I want to ask you a question. What are your health concerns?
I really looked forward to retirement. Couldn’t wait to hit the “golden years” and sit back and start taking advantage of all those “senior-only” discounts and travel bargains. But all of a sudden, when I turned 65, I started to feel my age. I thought my sexual prowess had gone the way of the Dodo. After taking your formula for a number of months, all I can say is, talk to my wife. She says that she feels like she’s living with a 25-year-old again!
Rock Hardeman, Fayetteville, NC
YOUR HEALTH CONCERNS.
Heart health is probably your number one worry. Heart attacks are the leading cause of death among men in the U.S. Cancer is the second leading cause of death among men in this country followed by stroke so these two killers must be high on your list of health concerns. Strokes happen in the brain so you have to be worried about brain health. Then there’s bone health, joint health, immunity health, vision health and certainly energy health. That’s a lot of health concerns. You have more than enough to worry about.
How would you like to purchase a product that promotes heart health, fights cancer, and supports your brain? A product that increases your energy, builds stamina, improves immune system function, adds glucose tolerance and increases cell metabolism? Not only that, but this product also gives you greater vitality, improves organ function and helps you adapt to stress. Remember, stress causes heart attacks, the number one killer of men like you.
That sounds like a fantastic opportunity. It’s my pleasure to tell you that the product is MAX-LIFE and it’s made by FoodState Nutrients, the company I started when I came back from China. MAX-LIFE is the first and only all natural high potency daily supplement designed specifically to meet male needs. From antioxidant and immune support to cardiovascular health, MAX-LIFE contains everything today’s on-the-go man requires for overall wellness.
- MAX-LIFE contains nutrients that protect your heart.
- Supports muscle growth & healthy blood sugar level.
- Supports the male hormone (testosterone).
- Promotes brain and memory function.
- Enhances energy levels.
- Supports digestion, liver & kidneys.
- Promotes healthy joints.
I’m a personal trainer and to stay successful at what I do, I have to be at the peak of physical performance. I’m a professional, and I not only have to look the part, I have to act the part. In other words, I have to have energy to spare. Your formula definitely keeps my energy level up, which in turn helps me to motivate my clients to reach their fitness goals.
Dirk Brockman, Cape Town South Africa
WHAT’S THE SECRET?
Remember the secret I promised to share with you? The key to the active lives led by the men of Linhai? Those secret ingredients contain amazing nutritional benefits and are part of the MAX-LIFE formula. They are the reason our company motto is “The merging of modern science with age-old wisdom.” Our product exclusives are the Green Superfoods, Hydra-Green and Hydrilla verticillata, which are high in magnesium-rich chlorophyll and provide a rich source of energy.
Hydra-Green is an aquatic herb that contains an abundance of beneficial phytochemicals proven as muscle builders and energy enhancers. Hydrilla verticillata is a wild-harvested rooted algae that is phytonutrient dense. MAX-LIFE is the only product in the U.S. that contains these exclusive enzymes that have been proven effective as muscle builders, energy enhancers, anti-arthritic agents and appetite suppressors.
In addition to the Green SuperFoods, you’ll benefit from 31 vitamins and minerals that are key to maintaining good health, 3 Amino Acid complexes that promote healthy hearts and 11 Tonic Whole Herb Extracts that enhance physical performance, concentration and help men adapt to stress.
I have a demanding career life. I’m not complaining. I love it. Sadly, I’ve seen many up-and-comers burn out before they made it even halfway up the corporate ladder. Most people can’t take the pace. For those with families, I think it’s the long hours that create the most stress. Since I started taking your formula I feel great! My schedule is hectic and I rarely have time to eat properly, but by taking your formula I manage to replenish what my regular diet doesn’t give me. I know I’m getting all of the vitamins, minerals, and nutrients I need.
Howard Walters, Bremerton, WA
MAKE A COMMITMENT TO YOUR HEALTH.
My Dad died of prostate cancer at the age of 54 before I developed the MAX-LIFE formula. I don’t want that to happen to you. Do you still believe that good health is the basis of a good life? Do you still want to gain control of your health and your vitality, be more active and improve your sex life? Then it’s time to make a commitment to your health.
As Director of the Concord Health Institute, I see our job as being more than just a mini-vacation for our patrons. I see it as an educational experience. We do our best to teach our patients how important complete nutrition is for their overall good health and well being. Your formula has been officially added to the standard meal plan here at the spa. We send a complimentary bottle of your formula home with other materials that we include in our “Re-entry kit”. (Re-entry back to the stressful world.) Your formula does the job at a very competitive cost for us.
Earle Lexton, Concord, MA
MAX-LIFE is the best supplement for today’s active men. It’s the first and only all natural high potency daily supplement designed specifically to meet male needs. You would expect to spend hundreds of dollars on a product that makes the kinds of claims we do. I’m thrilled to offer you 90 tablets (a 30-day supply) for only $49.95. Yes, that’s right − only$49.95 for the best daily supplement on the market today. Or you can purchase a 60-day supply for $79.95 or, our best deal, a 90-day supply for $105.95. For the 30-day supply that’s only $1.66/day or .55/tablet. What a deal! $1.66/day to gain control of your health and vitality.
Being a single Dad, I need to keep my energy level up to keep up with my 2 and 4 year old sons. It’s not easy, I can tell you. I’ve found that your formula helps me maintain the balance I need in the time I divide between work and home. For all of us, the best time of the day is when we’re all together. That’s why I make sure I have the reserves I need to give them the level of attention and quality time they deserve.
Tom Young, Salt Lake City, UT
ACT NOW BEFORE IT’S TOO LATE!
Our products are sold throughout North America and in 37 countries world-wide. Join the thousands of men who live active lives and have improved their sex lives. MAX-LIFE carries the “Quality Assurance Pledge”. To show you I stand behind my product, if you are not completely satisfied I offer a 100% Money Back Guarantee.
Before I tell you how to order MAX-LIFE I want to give you one more benefit of this amazing product. I shared with you that my Dad died of prostate cancer. Your family doesn’t want that to happen to you so I made sure that MAX-LIFE contains 6 outstanding natural additives that promote a healthy prostate – Vitamin D, Iron, Potassium, Vanadium, Zinc and Sarsaparilla Root. That’s to honor Dad’s memory.
As Head Coach of Athletes of America, I work with many promising young athletes. I do everything possible to help each one achieve his “personal best.” I use my training as a coach and mentor to help them achieve their personal goals and sole personal problems. No matter how carefully an athlete prepares himself there’s no way he can do his best if he doesn’t have the right fuel. This product keeps even world-class athletes in top form.
Jerome Cunningham, Tucson, AZ
SPECIAL DEAL!
It’s impossible to put a dollar value on good health, but starting today, April 20, 2012, I am delighted to offer you a special $10 discount for MAX-LIFE. $39.95 for a 30-day supply for one month until May 20, 2012. That’s $1.33/day or .44/tablet for a health product unlike any other. You need to fuel your body daily. The sooner you start the better you’ll feel. You have everything to gain – Energy, Stamina, Optimal Physical Well-Being. Take 1 tablet 3 times a day. Satisfaction Guaranteed.
DR. MARTIN’S WEIGHT WARRIOR DIET AND EXERCISE BOOK
Let’s be honest. Many of us are overweight and we don’t exercise enough. All the pills in the world aren’t going to make us healthy if we weigh too much. All the talk about healthy bodies isn’t going to make us strong unless we exercise. As my FREE GIFT to you I’m including Dr. Martin’s Weight Warrior Diet and Exercise Book with your order of MAX-LIFE. That’s a $14.95 value all yours absolutely FREE just for ordering MAX-LIFE. The recipes and exercises in my book were developed by skilled scientists at the Martin Smith Clinic and Health Awareness Clinic. If you carefully follow them you will enjoy a slimmer more attractive physique in one month’s time.
ORDER TODAY!
Yes. I want to be full of energy. Send me a 30-day supply of MAX-Life with the special $10 discount - $39.95
Yes. I want to be in command of my health. Send me a 60-day supply of MAX-Life at the low price of $79.95
Yes. I’m looking for increased stamina. Send me a 90-day supply of MAX-LIFE at the low low price of $105.95.
Yes. Include my FREE GIFT, Dr. Martin’s Weight Warrior Diet and Exercise Book, a $14.95 value.
Gain control over your health and vitality. Here’s how to order the Number 1 high potency daily supplement for men.
Check enclosed payable to FoodState Nutrients.
Bill My Master Card, Visa, AMEX, Discovery.
Account #: Exp. Date:
Total Charged:
Signature.
Your Name
Address
City State ZIP
Home Phone Number
Cell Phone Number
E-mail address.
FoodState Nutrients stands by its products. 100% Money Back Guarantee. Technical staff are available to answer questions 9 AM to 6 PM EST, Monday through Friday with our TOLL FREE NUMBER 1-866-000-0000. We do not release your contact information to anyone.
PS: If you order today you pay no postage. WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? DO IT NOW!
PPS: All proceeds from MAX-LIFE sales are donated to the Martin Smith Clinic and Health Awareness Center. We’re working constantly to improve our products.
PPPS: For more information on the ingredients and the benefits to be gained from MAX-LIFE visit our website,HTTP://WWW.FOODSTATE NUTRIENTS.COM. LIKE us on Facebook.
FoodState Nutrients, 1600 Greene St., Phoenix, AZ, 76553.
LIFTNOTE:
PROTECT YOUR HEART!
Dear Friend,
I’m a nutritionist specializing in working with men whose genetics and lifestyle made them susceptible to heart attacks. Over the years I have researched and tried many over the counter products that promised to restore energy and vitality to these men. I was looking for natural products that were safe to use. I wasn’t happy with the results of my efforts until I discovered MAX-LIFE.
MAX-LIFE contains six additives that specifically promote healthy hearts – Vitamin A, Vitamin C, Vitamin D, Amino Acid Complex, Dandelion Leaf & Root and Hawthorne Berry. The herbs, Dandelion Leaf & Root and Hawthorne Berry, in particular, are classified as “superior” for their health-enhancing capabilities and potent antioxidant qualities.
I strongly urge every man concerned about his heart health to start using MAX-LIFE now. The life you save may be your own.
Sincerely,
Ralph Bellows, PhD, San Antonio, TX
BUCKSLIP:
BE A WEIGHT WARRIOR!!
Dr. Martin’s Weight Warrior Diet and Exercise Book. $14.95 Value Absolutely FREE.
Lose weight FAST – Up to 1 pound a day for one month.
Delicious recipes and simple exercises.
Order MAX-LIFE NOW! $39.95. Shipping included.
WWW.FOODSTATE NUTRIENTS.COM. CALL TOLL FREE 1-866-000-0000.
FoodState Nutrients, 1600 Greene St., Phoenix, AZ, 76553.